4 weeks of CLEAN EATING ONLY

I'm really excited about sharing with you my journey back to my pre-pregnancy weight. 

The good, the bad, AND the ugly.

I gained a little over 50 lbs with this baby (my 2nd) and I have 20 lbs left to lose to get back to 115, which is where I originally started. 

Unlike my first, I worked out almost every single day AND ate as clean as I could (minus the first few weeks due to EXTREME morning sickness.) And even at that I STILL gained over 50 lbs! (60 with the first). 

For those of you that have ever taken before pictures before, you know that it can be sickening. All these things start flooding in your mind and can get you discouraged before you even start. 

I felt that exact same way here. ^^^

I had to be REALLY careful not to let that affect my mood or my attitude. But I TOTALLY understand why some people feel like they are "too far gone" to even try... and I empathize with you. 

But in the forefront of my mind I kept telling myself, "Jess, you KNOW the tools in order to lose the weight. You just have to WANT it bad enough and the EXCUSES will have to go."

So, before I got the OK to workout again, I decided I would start with Day 1 with my challengers, and eat CLEAN for 4 straight weeks until I was cleared. 

What made it TEN TIMES easier was that I had friends in this group that I was doing this with. I felt their pain and we PUSHED through together. Instead of just coaching them.. they were coaching me... and the accountability and support are the ONLY reasons I didn't give up. 

So, here i am. I followed the 21DayFIX meal plan to a T because it's the best meal plan structure I have found and is FOOL PROOF. 

I planned out my meals a week in advance and I made sure I had everything in my house that I needed and everything OUT that was going to tempt me. 

Thank goodness my scale was broke, so I had to rely mainly on how my clothes fit. 

After 4 weeks I felt pretty great with my progress! 

I am now on week 3 of Insanity now and can't wait to continue showing you my progress!! 

This past weekend I marked a HUGE goal off my list and got Insanity certified!!! 

My husband told me today that he would see my top abs!!!!!!!!! 

Staying LASER focused!!!!

The Pain behind the Smiles

I read a blog yesterday that had me relive one of the HARDEST times in my life thus far. For the past 5 years I wondered if anyone has ever felt the pain I did after having a miscarriage. And not just that pain of losing the baby, but the PAIN I endured ever.single.time I found out I was pregnant AGAIN.

I have talked about it with some, but I have an ENTIRE journal dedicated to that time in my life where I have literally screamed, cried & probably threw that journal across the room. 

It's a common problem, but for someone to TRULY understand that feeling- you must of had to walk in the shoes of a woman who has miscarried. 

It's been 4 years since we lost our first baby. 

I remember it like it was YESTERDAY. About 3 years after we were married, I was going in to get my wisdom teeth taken out. The Dr. told me that the antibiotic would counteract my birth control, so I need to make sure we are "careful". 

Matt and I had talked about having a family WAY before we were even married, so without even thinking twice about it, I thought let's just stop birth control altogether, and go ahead and start trying to have that family we have ALWAYS dreamed about.

Every month we waited to see a POSITIVE pregnancy test-- & each month felt like 100 years. Some of y'all might know what I'm talking about. And then to be disappointed every time it was negative just made the desire to be a mom more and more magnified.  

When I saw that positive sign come up, almost 2 years later, I might have screamed. I know that I BALLED. And I RAN into the bedroom and woke Matt up. We cried together and IMMEDIATELY thanked God for this blessing he had given us to be parents. 

We couldn't hold it in though. We told our family, our best friends and then the world. 

But everything changed a few short weeks later. 

I was at work one day when I started cramping pretty bad. I had cramped all along, but these cramps were familiar, and made me very nervous. 

As I walked into the bathroom I remember praying and asking God for everything to be ok.... but it wasn't. I tried really hard to get myself together, but I couldn't. I called Matt and a few minutes later we were on our way to the Dr. 

As they did the ultrasound, I had really no idea what they were looking at. I obviously saw there was a placenta, but the nurse kept pushing these buttons that made these colors show up on the screen. She didn't talk for a while, which made me think something was wrong. 

She looked at us and told us that the colors we saw on the screen was blood flowing, but there was no blood going to the placenta, which meant there was no heartbeat there. 

I felt like I had just died. 

I can't tell you much about what happened after that other than Matt just held me. He was so strong for me that day- but the hardest part was I knew he was not ok.  

We found out before we left that I needed to have surgery to remove everything. We drove home practically in silence. 

When we got home, Matt asked if I was ok, and asked if he could go back to the room for a little bit. A few minutes later I heard him sobbing. He had been strong for me- but now he needed to mourn.

The most beautiful thing that came out of that day was the song "Lullaby" that Matt wrote just trying to get his feelings out somehow. (You can find it on iTunes if you search for Matt Laughter- Glorify.) Share it with someone if you know it could help. 

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We ended up having 2 more miscarriages back to back after that one. 

And then nothing for a long time....

Then one day, I was 5 days late. 

I took another test for what felt like the bazillionth time, and before I opened my eyes I prayed over and over and over again.... God, if you are going to allow me to be pregnant, will you PLEASE allow me to keep this baby? And if you decide to take this baby away from me, will you PLEASE restore my joy in knowing this is the path that you have Matt and I on?  

Psalm 51:12 came to mind that day. Restore to me the joy of your salvation and grant me a willing spirit, to sustain me.

Losing 3 babies was difficult, but seeing a positive pregnancy test again was surprisingly much harder that day.

I had become SCARED out of my mind. 

Pregnancy should be a time of EXCITEMENT and JOY for what the future holds. For me, it was a daily reminder that there is nothing about this pregnancy that is in my control. 

I dreaded EVERY single Dr's visit.

I dreaded every single time I went to the bathroom.

I dreaded lifting anything that weighed more than a sheet of paper.

I dreaded having my heart beat raise just a little higher from climbing stairs. 

It was a very lonely time for me. 

People would ask "OH, when are y'all trying again", which that question never bothered me, but the FEAR of having to UN-tell them again is what made me sick to my stomach. 

And the one thing I can relate to most with the girl from the blog, is that I just LONGED for morning sickness.  I knew if I was sick then everything was "normal". When I told people I was nauseous they would say, "well, that's a good thing!" And to me, that would solidify that things were going like they should. 

But the second I stopped feeling nauseous, my mind started to remind me on how much I have no control over what is going on inside of me. 

It was a vicious cycle that took the joy out of the act of being pregnant. I was jealous of all my friends getting pregnant, throwing parties with not a care in the world, and here I was, afraid to move the wrong way for the mere fact that I may do something to cause me to lose the baby-- it was a heavy burden to bare. And it continued for 9 months. 

I am so beyond BLESSED that God's plan for Matt and I was to be parents to 2 very HEALTHY, beautiful, baby boys after those 3 miscarriages...

But it doesn't help the fact that I relive those days all over again when I hear of a friend's miscarriage. 

And there are STILL so many people who are just dying to be parents and still haven't had their miracle happen yet. I grieve with you. 

I'm so thankful for the people I had in my life who had been there to walk with us down that long road. I pray that I can do that and more to anyone who is going through that now, and know that you are NOT alone in this very long, scary, sometimes lonely journey. 

Faith Journey with Abraham

If you know anything about Matt and I, it would probably be that we don't necessarily do anything "normal," for God did not call us to be normal, but extraordinarily faithful! Bold & faithful!

In the last 8 years, we have moved 8 times! 8 TIMES PEOPLE! 

And most people would be quick to make the statements....."are you crazy?.... why?...... and what are you running from?" In fact, I said the same thing to myself.

Well, the answers to those questions are: YES... we are crazy, but crazy for Jesus...

 Because we never want to be disobedient to the things that Christ is telling us to do; and lastly, we aren't running FROM anything, but I think of it as running TOWARDS Him. 

The past 8 years that Matt and I have been married, God has done a HUGE work in our lives.

See, you never realize what baggage someone brings into the marriage until they are in it .  We all have junk from our past, whether negative or positive, & if allowed, can drive a wedge between the one's you love.  

With that said, God has taken us on a journey that has shaped us and developed us like never before, and that journey is called "Faith."

I thought I had "faith,"... but this is a totally different kind that I wasn't ready for.

God speaks to people differently.  

It may be through a vision, a dream, audibly, etc...but when God speaks to us, it's in a specific way and at a specific time of night.  

In the summer of 2011, I had yet another melt down. I was so tired of not being able to get pregnant and keep the baby. All my friends around me were pregnant and here I was pretending I was ok, when really I did not understand what was wrong with me. 

Then our first experience with "faith" happened. 

This experience was after having gone through 3 miscarriages. God gave Matt a word, through scripture, that we would have a child, not just a child, but that we would have a son.  

That was on October 27, 2011. 

The Scripture God used was Jesus spoke to Matt through was 2 Kings 4:17, "about this time next year you will embrace a son."  Matt told me he believed that with his entire heart...   But I was not convinced.

 It wasn't until January 6, 2012, God woke me up at around 3:40 am with an unction to take a pregnancy test... 

As I sat there waiting for the results, with my eyes closed as tight as I could get them, I begged God not to let me go through another year not being able to have a baby. And if he did allow me to be pregnant, that he would PLEASE allow me to keep it. 

When I opened my eye (and yes, I peeked with one eye, lol) I couldn't believe it, so I ran in and woke Matt up to tell him that WE WERE PREGNANT!!  We laughed really hard & then cried, and then praised Jesus! 

We were finally going to have a baby.  It seemed like time stood still waiting for the day that we would finally get to see what we were having.  

I just knew that we were having a girl!  Matt said, "No Jess, God told us that we were having a son!" But I just KNEW it was a girl!!

As they were doing the ultrasound, in my head I thought... God, if this is really a boy, then I'm in awe of the faith Matt had in believing You would do this... and I want that kind of faith. 

Matt acted in faith and believed in what God had told him... and you know what we saw??? Something between that baby's legs!!! It was A BOY. 

Kyson Gabriel Laughter was born 9/16/12..."about this time next year."

The second experience came just a couple of months ago when we felt it was time for us to sell our house. 

I DID NOT want to sell our house.  It was a dream home to me....It wasn't just our house, but Kyson's house. It was everything I had wanted & I was completely content there. 

Then again, God woke Matt up at 3:40 am and told him, "Go and don't look back." He asked God, "where are we going?"  God said, "don't worry about it, just go." 

God spoke to Matt through Genesis 19 that morning, and while Matt was away praying, God spoke to me too.  He told me that I needed to "live by faith and not by sight."... which is SO MUCH easier said than done and NOT something that I wanted to try.

We both knew that God was speaking though, so we put our house on the market.  Five hours of it being on the market, 3 people wanted to see the house.  Within 6 days... IT SOLD!! 

Faith.... & then obeying.

Now for the ULTIMATE EXPERIENCE!  The stepping out of the boat experience.  

3 weeks ago, God woke Matt up again.  He woke up and said, that if it was 3:40, he knew God had something to tell him. 

Matt had been awake for a few minutes before he looked at his phone, but when he looked at his phone, it showed 3:44 am.  

He immediately started crying and told me to pray.  God pointed him to a book by Mark Batterson called "Circle maker." He told Matt to read chapter 20.  The verse of the Chapter was Hebrews 11:8, 

"By faith Abraham, when called to go to a place he would later receive as his inheritance, obeyed and went, even though he did not know where he was going."

The chapter talked about stepping out in faith and doing something that you may not be ready to do, stating you will NEVER be ready, but God doesn't call the qualified, but qualifies the called.  

Faith without action is not faith at all. "You may need to quit your job, make a move, etc..." In that moment, God said, "Matt quit your job." 

When Matt came in and told me what God told him, we both knew it was time.  

Yes, we were scared, but we were more scared of being disobedient.  

Matt's words to me, "I will not and cannot be disobedient to God! How will I ever expect my boys to be faithful to God if I am not willing to leave that legacy for them and step out in faith?...I don't know what we are doing, where we are going, and yes, we have a baby on the way, but God has spoken."  

3 weeks ago, Matt quit his job, and was obedient to what he knew God was telling him and us to do.  We have NO IDEA what is next, but we pray God shows us soon.  It's a crazy ride, but I wouldn't trade this crazy, uncomfortable ride for any other COMFORTABLE kind of life :) 

Meal Plan

One of the HARDEST things about living a healthy lifestyle is finding the right meal plan. 

Do you count calories? How many times do you eat a day? What can I eat? How much of this food can I have?

It's all SO confusing. 

It wasn't until the 21DayFIX came out that I actually ENJOYED figuring out what to eat each week. Let me show you how I figured out HOW much I can eat and then I'll show you WHAT I eat. 

It's easy peasy. 

So, the 21DayFix comes with 7 containers. Each container is a different size and the point is PORTION CONTROL. 

For instance, I look at how many RED containers I can have a day. And I spread them out throughout my day. 

I pack my protein into that container... and if it fits I can eat it! I'm not having to weigh my food or check the oz. I simply put the meat in there until it's full and then I usually put it into a different Tupperware for the day so I'm not using these. 

This picture below shows you HOW I find out how many containers I can have a day. There is a little equation you do to figure out which bracket you are to be in. I'm in the 1,200-1,499 bracket so I follow the containers in the FIRST column. 

Each of the colors are a certain food. SO for instance I can have:

3 Green: vegetables

2 Purple: fruit

4 Red: protein

2 Yellow: Carbs

1 Blue: Healthy Fat

1 Orange: seeds

TBS: oils

This makes it a no brainer. I mean.. you can't mess this up. AND you do not get deprived of sweets. 3x a week you can have chocolate chips and they teach you how to make Shakeology bars... a STAPLE in my house. <--- talk about a grab-and-go snack, which Kyson can have too!! :) Oh.. and you can also have WINE. 

Plus, one red container can be replaced with a Shakeology shake, which came with my 21DayFix challenge pack.  Not gonna lie... sometimes I have 2 shakes a day. NBD though :) 

So here are the examples of what you can put into each container. So many options for each color and you PICK what you WANT. 

Below is an example of a dinner I had. This is 1 Red container, 1 Green Container and 1 yellow container. 

(recipe from http://www.geniabeme.com/2014/03/21-day-fix-broccoli-and-cheese-stuffed-chicken-recipe.html)

1 Chicken Breast (this counted as 2 red containers for me)

Cheddar Cheese (1 blue)

Frozen Broccoli (1 green)

Salt

Pepper

Onion Powder

Garlic Powder

Cayenne Pepper

Paprika

Preheat oven to 350'.

I took a chicken breast and butterflied it. I placed saran wrap on top of it and started to hit it with a mallet to get the chicken thinner and the same width all over for even cooking. Once I did that, I put all the seasonings I wanted. Then I added a layer of cheese and then a layer of broccoli. Not too much or you won't be able to roll it up. 

Once its rolled up, I turn it upside down so the part where the chicken ended wouldn’t open up. I then put more seasoning on the top. If you are using an oven, I would also rub olive oil all over this at this point too.

Put in oven for 25-35 minutes or until chicken is fully cooked. Take it out and add a little more cheese on top and then melt it. This is delicious!

Here is another idea of a healthy lunch you can have! 

              Whole Wheat Pasta = 2 Yellow Tomatoes with spices = 1 Green Pepper Jack Cheese = 1 Blue

So for this time around I went to costco and bought:

10 lb bag of boneless skinless chicken

Ground Turkey

Broccoli

Spinach

Mixed veggies

Eggs

Bananas

Grapes

Cantaloupe

Cashews

Chocolate chips

Brown Rice

Matt and I chose 2-3 things from each color container to eat for the month. We spent ONLY $159.00 (that included snacks for our son) total for this month!! That is the benefit in buying in bulk. You get WAY more for your money! PLUS, if you ONLY get what you need to set yourself up for SUCCESS... you will!!!!! 

Here is an example of a 21DayFIX meal I found that I will use for next time!

Here’s a tip from Autumn Calabrese, the creator of the 21 Day Fix. VERY IMPORTANT!!

“I received this email today, I’m not sharing the person but I am sharing the story. She is discouraged because after losing 5lbs the first week she has started to gain weight jn week two. She sent a sample of her food for yesterday. Even in the lowest calorie bracket she missed 2 green containers, 2 red containers and an orange. You CANT modify the program on your own and expect results. I’ve done all the work for you all you have to do is follow it. If you don’t eat enough your body will hold on to everything you give it and you won’t lose weight. Sometimes you will even gain. Follow the program to a T and I promise you will see results.

Lastly, I wanted to leave you with a little motivation. This is Rachel, and her 21DayFIX results. It's so easy to not eat clean... but when you do... AMAZING things can happen.

When YOU are ready, I'm ready to help you reach YOUR highest potential. I can't do this for you. You have to make the decision that you are going to start this and COMPLETE it. Don't think you are too far gone or it's too late to start. If you keep waiting... you will NEVER know what you are capable of. Plus... it's only 21 days ;) 

Email me at jess.laughter06@gmail.com or find me on FB at fb.com/jessicahudginslaughter

I'm DEDICATED to your SUCCESS. 

xoxo, Jessica

I'm hoping you end up different

Hello 2nd Trimester...

This pregnancy has been VERY different from the first in many ways. 

First of all, I was SICK from the beginning. First trimester was a monster to me. Never experienced that with Kyson, but it was FAR from enjoyable. 

I went from working out every day to starting my workout, going to get sick... then laying on the couch the rest of the day trying not to move so I wouldn't get sick again. 

I swore it was a girl. 

We came up with girl names, girl room ideas, even decided how we were planning on rearranging rooms so we could have a co-ed play room. 

Then at 19 weeks.... we saw something that did NOT look like a girl. 

SHOCKED was the word... but as Matt jumped up and down in the ultrasound, room pointing to how we knew it was a boy, and trying to explain why he was acting so crazy to Kyson, tears ran down my face as secretly... I loved being a boy mom. And I wanted to stay one. 

I grew up with sisters so there was ALWAYS drama in my house. And even though I graduated from HS 10 years ago and left right away for college, those days of boys breaking our hearts, girls backstabbing, and my feelings always getting hurt still hit WAY too close to home. I don't think I was ready to replay that just yet. 

Deep down I wanted to continue playing in the dirt with the boys. I wanted to go fishing and teach them how to shoot a gun. 

But it took us 5 years to get pregnant. And even though I told God "I don't care what we have... I just want to be a mom"..... SO MANY TIMES... deep down my dream was to have just 1 more boy. And there it was. I got my dream. So far all boys. 

A miracle from God. Period. 

So let's recap 1st trimester. 

I immediately gained 15 lbs. Went from 115 to 130 in a matter of seconds (I felt like). 

I couldn't keep anything down, but when I could my dinner consisted of mashed potatoes and bread. Literally. Even my favorite Shakeology I couldn't stomach. 

I worked out 3 days a week consistently though. No matter what- even if I was working through a naceous feeling but always listened to my body if it said stop. 

Then came trimester 2 :) 

So I finally got my act together. My sickness went away and I felt human again. BUT, I had to slow way down with my out of control eating. 

So, I started 21Day Fix, and immediately I lost 2 lbs in 1 day. 

Now, I wasn't trying to lose weight. BUT, I went from eating crap to eating lean meats and veggies.. so that's what will happen to you. 

21DayFIX<--- It's 30 minute workouts, BUT it's based off of fitting what you can eat into a container (they provide). If it doesn't fit, you can't eat it... if it does.. you can :) SO SO SO simple and I LOVED being told WHAT to do and WHAT to eat. 

Believe me--->you can literally JUST change what you are eating and you will see a difference... just try it.   

I started doing the 21DayFIX workouts. And on the days they did Pilates and yoga (which I'm not doing) I did Body Beast arms. 

I had noticed I'd lost some strength in the first trimester, where I wasn't working out as much. So the workouts were HARD for me. I had to press pause way more than usual and really make sure my heart rate was always between 140-150 (heart rate monitor is a life saver!)

Since day 1 of my second semester I haven't stopped working out. 

BUT everything I'm doing, I was doing before. (not safe to start anything new). 

My plan for the next few weeks is this... 

I am going to finish up 21 Day Fix. 

Then I'm moving on to T25 in May (starting an online challenge group with some people like you!) using the modification for some moves I can't do, while still doing Body Beast Arms 2x a week to keep my strength up. 

I am not, nor will I ever be the girl that doesn't have to work hard to stay fit. Some people have that luxury. I am not that person. 

I gained 60 lbs with my first. I was MISERABLE coming into my third trimester. I wobbled everywhere. My ankles were so swollen my shoes didn't fit. It was the dead of summer and even with a bathing suit I felt like I had too many clothes on. 

I only worked out during my 1st trimester and it was very light. Usually the elliptical a few times a week. I wasn't educated correctly on what I could still continue doing-- so I didn't do much. 

 So, I'm pushing to not gain that with this one. (I'm 5 feet tall. 60 lbs is WAY to much for my size). 

I'm wearing size 6 jeans (I was normally a 2), and I have to be VERY careful about late night eating.

If I eat bad at night I can guarantee I'm 2 lbs heavier the next morning. <--- crazy.

So instead, I go for shakeology if I feel the urge to eat something I shouldn't. It's like a milkshake for me anyway and has WAY more nutrition in it than Id ever be able to make on my own. 

Because I gain weight so easily, I eat very plain. 

chicken

tuna

tilapia

ground turkey

egg salad

salads

turkey bacon

LOTS of eggs with salsa 

apples with PB

cantaloupe

steamed veggies

and shakeology. 

My cheat is a hand full of dark chocolate chips 3x a week (21DayFIX approved.)

Since then, I have managed to stay the same weight for a few weeks now, which is what I was going for. 25-35 lbs is normal to gain for a pregnancy... but I'll have to CONSCIOUSLY work hard! 

Each month I host online challenge groups to help people stay motivated to workout. But honestly, it helps me JUST AS MUCH. 

Just because I'm a coach, doesn't mean I am exempt from occasionally eating ice cream or skipping a week of workouts. I am human! 

The rest of this pregnancy I'm going to post daily on my Facebook page what I'm doing so that I can hold myself accountable. I hope that it will help and inspire other moms out there......

Ones that have either just started this journey.. or need to feel like the struggles they are going through are NORMAL.

^^^ If you know anyone like that, please share this page with them! 

Until next time,

Jessica Laughter 

 

21 weeks